Talking about mental health can feel intimidating, but it’s one of the most important conversations we can have. Whether you’re opening up about your own struggles or supporting someone else, honest discussions about mental well-being help break stigma and create stronger relationships. Mental health affects everyone, yet many people still hesitate to talk about it due to fear of judgment, misunderstanding, or rejection.
The good news is that conversations about mental health are becoming more common, and the more we talk about it, the easier it gets. This article explores the challenges of discussing mental health, provides practical communication tips, and offers guidance on what to do when someone isn’t as supportive as you’d hoped:
- Common barriers to talking about mental health
- Tips for effective communication
- What to do if someone isn’t supportive
- Breaking the stigma and talking about mental health is imperative to change our mindset
Common barriers to talking about mental health
Even though attitudes around mental health are improving, many people struggle to open up. Here are some of the most common reasons why:
Fear of judgment
Many people worry that admitting to struggling with their mental health will lead to negative reactions or be seen as a sign of weakness. This fear can stop them from seeking support when they need it most.
Misunderstanding and stigma
Mental health conditions like anxiety and depression are often misunderstood. Some people still believe in outdated myths, such as “just think positive” or “mental health problems are all in your head.” These misconceptions can make it harder to speak up.
Not knowing how to start the conversation
Sometimes, it’s not stigma that holds people back but simply not knowing what to say. Finding the right words to express your feelings can be challenging, especially if it’s your first time discussing mental health with someone close to you.
While these barriers are real, they can be overcome with the right approach. Talking about mental health doesn’t have to be awkward—it just takes understanding and practice.
Tips for effective communication
If you’re ready to open up about your mental health or support someone who is, here are some tips to make the conversation meaningful and supportive.
Practice active listening
Active listening is the practice of fully concentrating on, understanding, and responding to what someone is saying, rather than just passively hearing the words. It involves maintaining eye contact, showing empathy, and using verbal or non-verbal cues (such as nodding or summarising key points) to make the speaker feel truly heard and valued.
Sometimes, the best thing you can do is just listen. If someone is opening up to you, avoid interrupting or jumping in with solutions. Instead, show that you’re engaged by using phrases like:
- “That sounds really difficult. I appreciate you sharing this with me—how can I support you?” (This validates their feelings and shows that you’re open to helping.)
- “I hear that you’re feeling overwhelmed right now. Do you want to talk more about it, or would you prefer some space?” (This acknowledges their emotions and gives them control over the conversation.)
- “It sounds like this situation has been really tough for you. I’m here to listen if you want to talk more about it.” (This shows empathy and reassures them that they’re not alone.)
- “I can see why you’d feel that way. That makes a lot of sense—do you want to explore possible solutions together, or would you rather just vent?” (This validates their feelings while respecting their needs in the conversation.)
Use supportive language
The way we talk about mental health matters. Avoid phrases like:
- “You’re overreacting.”
- “Other people have it worse.”
- “Just snap out of it.”
Instead, try using compassionate and validating language:
- “I can see that this is really hard for you.”
- “Your feelings are valid.”
- “I’m here to support you however I can.”
Set boundaries when needed
While being there for someone is important, it’s also essential to set healthy boundaries. If someone is leaning on you heavily for emotional support, it’s okay to encourage them to seek professional help or reach out to others. You can say something like:
- “I care about you, and I want to help, but I also think it might help to talk to a therapist.”
- “I’m always here to listen, but I also want to make sure you have other people to support you too.”
Remember, you’re not responsible for fixing someone else’s mental health, but offering kindness and guidance can make a big difference.
What to do if someone isn’t supportive
Unfortunately, not everyone reacts well when mental health is brought up. If you experience dismissiveness, invalidation, or a lack of support, here’s how to handle it.
Stay calm and don’t take it personally
If someone reacts negatively, it often says more about their own experiences and beliefs than it does about you. Some people struggle to understand mental health issues because they were raised in environments where these topics were ignored or stigmatised.
Try educating them (if they’re open to it)
If the person is willing to listen, gently share information about mental health. You can say:
- “Mental health is just as important as physical health. It’s something a lot of people struggle with.”
- “Would you be open to reading about anxiety/depression? It might help explain what I’m going through.”
Seek support elsewhere
If someone repeatedly dismisses or invalidates your feelings, don’t let their reaction stop you from reaching out to others. Talk to a trusted friend, family member, therapist, or mental health community. There are plenty of people who will understand and support you.
Breaking the stigma and talking about mental health is imperative to change our mindset
Talking about mental health with friends and family can feel daunting, but it’s a crucial step toward breaking stigma and building strong, supportive relationships. By approaching these conversations with openness, patience, and compassion, we can create safe spaces where people feel comfortable discussing their struggles:
- Practice active listening
- Use supportive language
- Set boundaries if necessary
- Stay cool, calm and collected
- Seek support if you feel overwhelmed
Not everyone will react the way you hope, but that doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t valid. Keep advocating for your mental well-being, surround yourself with people who support you, and remember: You are never alone in this journey.
I think the stigma attached to mental illness will disappear just like it did for cancer years ago. — Peter Haugen, Aileen McCrillis, Geert Smid, & Mirjam Nijdam, 2017
